i've mentioned on this blog before that i'm not a fan of the neuro patients. they smell funny, you have to do neuro checks ALL THE TIME, you can't sedate them usually.........basically neuro patients are my least favorite. also, their communication skills are lacking.
i had this patient, neuro dood (alkyhall + motor transportation = neuro patient at my hospital), who had some communication problems. i'm getting this in report from Nurse Dayshifter, also another male nurse. so, Dayshifter is spaining to me that the guy had some pain and couldn't really verbalize or localize the pain. what ever it was, it hurt worse than the hole in his head. so Dayshifter is valiantly trying to ascertain where the pain is coming from.
does you head hurt? does your chest hurt? do you need to poo? are you having a hard time breathing? and etcetera.
finally he worked his way to-is your catheter hurting you? and got an affirmative nod. so Dayshifter inspects the offending foley catheter.
warning; what he found will make any dood readers cringe. fair warning, don't say i didn't warn 'ya.........
the guy's penis tip had dried up and gotten sort of stuck to one spot on the catheter. and then, as if that wasn't bad enough, the guy's penis had gotten a little more blood in it (making it longer, for those of you born without aforementioned equipment. growth and shrinkage are a natural part of the day-), and so his.........tip had sort of inverted, being as it was, stuck to that particular stretch of foley tubing.
we will now allow a brief intermission for the male readers of this blog to recover from that last sentence. i'm shuddering a little myself just thinking about it.............
................and we're back. so Dayshifter procured a syringe of lube and 'freed' the penile tip from his unlubed situation.
wow.
Dayshifter is telling me this in report and we're both just cringing, just from his telling me the story.
yikes. i tell ya, for some reason, the female dayshift nurse i gave report to the following morning seemed......unimpressed. i guess it takes having one to know the true gravity of the situation.
the guy slept really well afterwards though. poor guy, he was probably exhausted.
4 comments:
Yeah, that's about 7/10 on the dichter scale....
I used to work with a male nurse who always asked what side they hang, an he'd tape it on that side. I remember scratching my head wondering about that for years until it dawned on me. Duh.
Wow -- So now I totally understand why they lube the wee wees of the urology patients after surgery every day. Poor dude!
Yup, I'm like *YAWN*
Sorry. I suppose I have no sympathy simply because I've birthed 10+ pounds of human (twice) out of my who-haw and nothing can compare to the stretch, the pain, the losing count after 50 stitches, the breaking tail bone, the perineal infection, and not being able to sit.
Foley schmoley.
I guess I need a wiener to understand. But then, that would make for an awkward conversation wouldn't it?!?! Hee hee.
Thanks for the graphic post though. Certainly entertaining in a weird nursing black humor way.....for what it's worth. I dig it.
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